I watched two masterpieces and cried uncontrollably

Well, the crying part is nothing new when I watch romantic movies, but the two recent movies I watched felt like those stories where one just can't not imagine themselves in the protagonist's shoes and cry on their behalf.

I had been exposed to South Korean cinema much before Parasite was a phenomenon, through films like Train to Busan and Snowpiercer. But then I saw a few YouTube videos regarding the recently released movie called 'Past lives'. It is a romantic drama, showing the journey of two childhood friends, where the girl emigrates from Seoul to Canada to then New York. Without giving much spoilers, I'll just describe the parts I think made the plot very relatable. The girl, Nora, falls in love with the guy, Hae Sung, on Skype, 12 years after she had left him due to her emigration. But here's the problem, Nora is ambitious. She thinks she's being held back in her New York Journey, chasing a Pulitzer, by this old stupid love of hers. Selfishly, she decides not to talk to him for some time, cuts him off her life, and starts focusing on her journey. The last phase of the movie is when she is married to an American writer, living an ordinary life in New York City, and Hae Sung comes to visit her, simply to get the closure that he wants. Over the two days, they had immense fun; he even met her husband, and admitted that he didn't know why so much love existed inside him for her. Eventually, of course, there has to be a goodbye. Here's where the movie is at its peak. Two childhood friends turned lovers, who weren't destined to be together, standing on a New York City pavement, waiting for an Uber. They hugged, and that was the only mutual moment of physical intimacy they had, probably in their entire lives. While Hae Sung was clear that he loved her, and was there just to let her go, Nora probably didn't even realise it until she hugged him. Hae Sung leaves, and Nora returns to her apartment crying. One small line that Hae Sung said struck me the most. Here's the line:

In the end, love does become an act of letting go, doesn't it?

That's what brings me to the second movie - On your wedding day, another South Korean romantic comedy. It was an extremely interesting and funny movie, showing how an adolescent school romance drives a boy to end up in the same university as his talented girlfriend, only to find she's dating someone else. Eventually, when they do get close again, he saves her from an accident but gets injured himself. What does he lose? His physical education finals, so he has to repeat a year. What does he gain? Her. 

Initially, he was happy. Those few scenes that showed their blossoming love were among the happiest scenes I have watched on a screen for a very long time, but the guy Hwang woo-yeon, doesn't pass his finals with the grade required to become a teacher, his dream. Soon, his job search turns into a struggle, and the girl, Hwan Seung-hee overhears him ranting to one of his friends that he might regret ever running into her again in college in case his life turns into a failure. There was no going back for them, Hwan Seung-hee was too hurt to stay, and she left to chase her dream in Belgium. Much later, she visits him at a school where he's teaching (yes, he succeeded), to inform him of her wedding. Hwang woo-yeon is obviously hurt, but asks her to send a wedding invite. When the invite comes, he is absolutely shattered, and decides not to attend it, until he finds this:

The end of the story is again about letting go. He visits her in her room, right before her marriage, and tells her how grateful he is about ever falling in love with her. He thanks her for giving him direction, and love. And she thanks him for giving her support. And that's it, that's the end of the story. Unhappy ending. It's not unrequited love, it's just requited love that was never meant to be.

Words can't ever do justice to the masterpieces these two movies were. I hope you find the time to watch them and feel the overwhelming flow of emotions that these protagonists would've felt. And I sincerely hope that love doesn't reduce to an act of letting go for you. Lovers deserve better.

To the one who can't express affection

To the boys who can't express affection well

You will find someone who knows

Your love is imperfect, not incomplete

We're mostly hidden lovers with love hidden inside of us

People can't hear the song we play on our way back home

How would they know it was the same song you were hearing that morning

When you first met her

They won't know why you wore that shirt to the interview

It was the same shirt you wore on the night of your first kiss

They won't see the smile on your face for hours

After you've cut the call with her and are supposed to sleep

Why is it so important to scream love and why should you not be allowed to just feel it in private?

They won't see those notes you write to her at the end of every day

And I know you're hoping to show them to her soon

You haven't written much, it's just everything that happened with you each day

And all you want is for her to know what it would be like to be your soul

With you, every millisecond, being the reason you feel any emotion at all

Oh, and I know you haven't washed that hoodie you lent her

And even in the heat, you're sleeping in it, hoping she was around

They won't see your bookmarks and see the millions of things you want to gift her

Neither will they see you praying to be capable enough of surprising her with those

They will call you a self-proclaimed snob and a workaholic

But they won't gift you the cup of chai you're sacrificing to buy a ticket to her place

They won't know why you bought the perfume she uses

And why you spray it on your window curtains at night, hoping it fills your room with her smell

They won't see the password-protected folder where you've kept 5439 pictures of her

The place you go to when she's out enjoying with her other friends

They'll call you 'emotionally unavailable' without knowing how you're longing for her to share her emotions with you 

They won't know why the cricket team you were cheering for has changed

They won't know the reason behind the Google ads of earrings and necklaces

They won't know why you wake up and walk at 2 AM in the night

Listening to every single voice note she's sent

How will they know all of it?

You're not one to scream or shout what you feel

You don't want anyone else to know your channels of showing love

But when things will go wrong, as they always go wrong, and you'll be lonely

And they're gossiping behind your back, while you hide your tears and swollen eyes in your sunglasses

You'll be called 'the one who can't express affection'

Or worse, 'The one who never loves'